Could you Finnish moms please answer some of my questions?

Why are they so shy? Why do they keep turning me down all the time?

finnish men are quite ' old fashioned' and a black woman is maybe too much for them to handle.

Also is u' re too pushy, they might get scared.

U have to give them time to make the first move.

I' d like to get to know them, but all they do is stare.

The answer is - they just are. Well, I personally think they' re more dumb and rude than shy. And I really don' t know why you' re being " turned down" (from what? sex? dates? flirtation?)

sounds like both you and them have the problem. you haven' t tried to speak to them and they haven' t come to you. maybe you should make the first move if they are too shy. maybe they just don' t don' t know that you' d like to get to know them.

That' s what we do. We' ve perfected The Stare: the blank Evil Bovine stare that makes you ask

a) what' s wrong with me?

b) what' s wrong with her/him?

c) will it never stop?

d) what medication is she/he on?



Man, I hate this country. I hate my fellow Finns. I want out, hear me, OUT!

I' ve tried to talk to the moms at the playground, but most of them seem very shy too! Or maybe embarrased about their English (which I think is just fine!)

I think she is still here because she is a Finn, unfortunately.

I also wonder what is keeping me here.

i think you' re right. the language could be bigger problem than being too shy.

being a finn doesn' t mean you have to live here. many of my finnish firends live abroad. it just isn' t that big thing nowdays.

And yes, I think the reason of not talking to you at the playground is shyness; they' re afraid to say something wrong and then ahve you laughing at them.. thenagain most of them can speak English better than some natives :) And Finnish men.. oh yes, definitely their own species, they' re just not that straightforward. Better luck next time :D

Vierailija:

I' ve tried to talk to the moms at the playground, but most of them seem very shy too! Or maybe embarrased about their English (which I think is just fine!)

Perhaps you are a Finn and you try to talk to Finnish Mums in English? That is a sure way to make them stare at you and keep even more distantance.

If you are not a Finn it just might be, as someone mentioned, that you are " wrong color" . Finns are not too much interested of people coming from different cultures. Why do you think Finns travel to Tallinn or Gran Canaria? Well, you don' t even have to talk English there and you can always find menus in Finnish.

Vierailija:

being a finn doesn' t mean you have to live here. many of my finnish firends live abroad. it just isn' t that big thing nowdays.

unless you have well-paid job, four kids and a husband here.

Many of us Finns are very uncertain to speak English, even though we all have learned it at school for several years. Most of us are also very shy and feel unsecure with different or foreign people.



Anyway, you are not alone with the problem other moms not taking any contact at you. At least in the small villages most moms just gather in their little groups with neighbours they have known all their lives and for a newcomer it is very hard to be accepted as one of the group.



Maybe you have heard that it takes time to get to know a Finn, but when you do, the friendship will last for a lifetime :)

I once read an article that told about how Finland was shown in media in Germany. Finns were told to be mad, depressed and lazy. The things Finns were famous about, can you guess them?



No, it was Nokia and it was not Kimi Räikkönen. It was Kutemajärven festivaalit or something like that and eukonkanto.



Grrrrrrrrrrrrrreat!

Vierailija:

Many of us Finns are very uncertain to speak English, even though we all have learned it at school for several years. Most of us are also very shy and feel unsecure with different or foreign people.

Anyway, you are not alone with the problem other moms not taking any contact at you. At least in the small villages most moms just gather in their little groups with neighbours they have known all their lives and for a newcomer it is very hard to be accepted as one of the group.

Maybe you have heard that it takes time to get to know a Finn, but when you do, the friendship will last for a lifetime :)

I could say that the beginning of the sentence is true, but according to my experience the end of it is not. If the original writer would just happen to be a foreigner really, I recommend her to stay far from Finnish Mums and to get to know some nice immigrant ladies here.

I must say that I agree with 18 here, it is hard to get to know Finnish people, they' re not open like that but once you do, it surely will last. So well said there! :)

It' s often difficult to start a small talk even between us Finns. And when you have to use foreign language, there are even bigger obstacles. Most people are not mean, even though they look rude and so on. It is just the Finnish melancholy... it' s everywhere here. :)



Mici

which sentence were you referring to?

I recommend her to stay far from Finnish Mums and to get to know some nice immigrant ladies here.