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How many dogs does it take to change a light bulb?

1. Golden Retriever: The sun is shining, the day is young, we' ve got our whole lives ahead of us, and you' re inside worrying about a stupid burned out bulb?



2. Border Collie: Just one. And then I' ll replace any wiring that' s not up to code.



3. Dachshund: You know I can' t reach that stupid lamp!



4. Rottweiler: Make me.



5. Boxer: Who cares? I can still play with my squeaky toys in the dark.



6. Lab: Oh, me, me!! Pleeeeeeeeeze let me change the light bulb! Can I? Can I? Huh? Huh? Huh? Can I? Pleeeeeeeeeze, please, please, please!



7. German Shepherd: I' ll change it as soon as I' ve led these people from the dark, check to make sure I haven' t missed any, and make just one more perimeter patrol to see that no one has tried to take advantage of the situation.



8. Jack Russell Terrier: I' ll just pop it in while I' m bouncing off the walls and furniture.



9. Old English Sheep Dog: Light bulb? I' m sorry, but I don' t see a light bulb!



10. Cocker Spaniel: Why change it? I can still pee on the carpet in the dark.



11. Chihuahua: Yo quiero Taco Bulb. Or " We don' t need no stinking light bulb."



12. Greyhound: It isn' t moving. Who cares?



13. Australian Shepherd: First, I' ll put all the light bulbs in a little circle...



14. Poodle: I' ll just blow in the Border Collie' s ear and he' ll do it. By the time he finishes rewiring the house, my nails will be dry.



How many cats does it take to change a light bulb?



Cats do not change light bulbs. People change light bulbs. So, the real question is:

" How long will it be before I can expect some light, some dinner, and a massage?"



ALL OF WHICH PROVES, ONCE AGAIN, THAT WHILE DOGS HAVE MASTERS, CATS HAVE STAFF